Reflection: LATE JANUARY '20

Standing above the party below. There was apparently a tightrope walker but he got booked. 

I took my hair down and drank my bottled water. And armed the scrunchie.

My mouth tastes like Red Bull, and I don’t want to go back downstairs for fear of noise and nude enclosure. Enclosed around nude people and closed up nude inside too. And the noise in my ears and eyes. 

With the 2 stars above me I can just make out my hands. And my nose. And my hair is down and I want a hand to hold.

But why can’t the music or sexual tension cool my nerves and my lonely lonely mentally? It's Friday night. And I'm on a balcony.

It’s 20 till midnight too and boys and girls are in the pink. I'm working. And I escaped to a ledge. Hope floats in thick air.  

Whether or not I die an old madam or a young widow I shall forever wish the crest in my brow would relax into an eye and the mind of my mind would creep towards still. 

Knowing that it will turn on again in the light of mid day, searching for kid day.

Let the screams of purpose and heat lamp moths rest and rest and fly when they are cold. And let the mind's eye stay warm without a lamp.

Cheers! Cheers to alarms that buzz and new eyes that meet and wonderment for known surprises and fearful hellos and goodbyes. Yes, just say yes today. 

Yes to tomorrow too. Hello, midnight.